Woman with missing teeth, grabbing tourist and yelling: I'm not a cop, I'm a Ho!
-42nd & 8th
Skinny white girl to angry boyfriend: Those guys that I flirt with at work, I get paid to flirt with them. It's like I'm a prostitute.
Hobo: Not with that ass, you're not!
Tourist to Hobo on bench: Oh shit, where am I?
Hobo on bench: Welcome to hell, lady.
Tourist: No mate, I just flew in from there yesterday.
Hobo: Can I get a dollar, so I can beat up Hipsters and get booze?
Guy: I want to do that for free.
Hobo: Yeah, me too, but it's more fun when you're drunk.
-Driggs & 2nd
Hobo to teen girls walking on grates in heels: Be careful, Spice Girls!
Hobo to passing man: Hey asshole, got any fucking change?
-10th St & 2nd
Hobo: Next stop, 42nd street. 42nd street used to be a nice place for the whole family to smoke crack together, but Giuliani got jealous and cleaned it up. Now you know what's there? Tourists. Non--crack-smokin' tourists, with their little click-click, takin' the pictures! No more crack on 42nd street and it's a damn shame!
-6th Ave and Houston
Hobo: Anybody got the time?
Peeing Guy: Yeah, it's 4:40.
Hobo: In the afternoon?
-Bathroom, Port Authority
Cracked-out Hobo watching crazy hobo yelling in the distance: What the hell is his problem?
Bag Lady: I don't know, must be on drugs or suttin'. Damn! I'm so glad we not like that.