Recently Heard in the City
Mom #1: Wow, it is such a beautiful day out. I really wish there was a park around here.
Mom #2: Yeah, they should get on that.
--83rd St & Madison Ave
Girl #1: So what's your background? What nationalities are you?
Girl #2: Oh, I'm just American. I'm Jewish, though.
Blonde: There were three of them; they were twins.
--Lunasa Bar, East Village
Bimbette #1: Oh my god! I just realized my brother and I have the same last name!
Bimbette #2: Really?
Bimbette #1: Yeah, it never hit me before.
Frazzled mother to young child: Hurry. Hurry. Look, the monster is going to get you if you don't walk faster!
Instructor: Those people outside are crazy, wearing big ol' leather boots in this kind of heat!
Student: Maybe they're from Texas?
Instructor: Nah, they looked pretty American to me.
--Beauty School, 35th & 8th
Husband in theater: Water? I never touch the stuff. Fish fuck in it.
Wife, looking around, embarrassed: Go on, honey. Have another beer.
--Shakespeare in the Park, Delacourte Theatre
Male NYU student: Yay, my mom's picking me up!
Sobbing five-year-old girl to mom in CD section: I wanna download, I don't wanna waste my money.
--Borders, Columbus Circle
Barista to client: Today is the first day of summer, so it's the longest day of the year!
Client: Oh, yeah, how long is it exactly? Cashier: I dunno, like 27 hours or something.
Frantic woman: Excuse me, is this the train to Manhattan?